visit him before you leave, if you wish, but try to xnxx asia keep it to a maximum of five minutes." My heart lifts and flutters as he says this, and I smile at him thankfully, edging towards the door. "Thank you," I say, itching to leave. But he lays a hand on my arm, halting me. "Wait a moment, Jeremiah. I want you to come back tomorrow, so I can have another look at your shoulder. If www.xnxx.com it has worsened again, we'll have to keep you another night. But for now, keep taking the anti-inflamatories and pain-killers. And.. as for Shae..." I blink and look at him vidio xnxx hurriedly. "I... I don't tamil xnxx know if this will mean anything to you... but just before he slipped into the coma, he told me to tell you that he was sorry xnxx indian about the picture. xnxx barat He was.. xnxx.com rather insistant on it. xnnx I didn't know if it was some kind of delerium..." xnxx stories I shake my head, feeling my chest start to feel funny again. "No.. it... means something...to me," telugu xnxx I say, looking down. "Thank you." The doctor nods quietly at me, and I slip out of the japanese xnxx room, carrying the coat that Brendan brought me on one arm, heading towards Shae's room, one I've been able to look at through the window xnxx japanese all night and day but not been able to see inside. I've seen doctors going in and out of it frequently, sometimes in xnxx anime two or xnxx telugu threes. I swallow hard as I approach the blank, grey door, and laying a hand on the doorknob, I try to prepare myself as I push it open, feeling the world breathing and shaking all around me. Slipping inside the twilight-filled zoo xnxx room, I see Shae's still form lying on the bed, his chest bare and his skin riddled with countless sensors, IV's in each arm and the xnxx xnxx backs of his hands, taped there with an eerie white tape. Swallowing again, I approach slowly, xnxx tv dropping my coat on the chair of the bokep xnxx desk as I pass. nxnn Distantly I hear the quickening beeping of the heart monitor above his head, and I come to a stop at his side, trying not to xnxx video pass out as I see his face. desi xnxx He looks dead.. lying there so xnxx hd still... his face is so pale, completely drained of colour. I grip the japanese xnxx side of his bed as I feel my mind rebell against the vision it sees, his hair fanned out on the pillow, some strands of it still caked with blood, a mask covering his lips, xnxx sex pushing oxygen into him. The mask is taped to his cheeks, and his lips are cracked and bloody under it. I xnxx tv whimper as I look at him, noticing for the first time how slender he is, how fragile and breakable. It seems like I could reach wwwxnxx out and touch him, and watch him break into a thousand peices. Without his xnxx india spirit moving his body, it becomes almost unremarkable and ordinary. My heart weeps as I see indo xnxx this, and I want, more xnxx barat than anything, to lift xnnx him up and hold him to me, protect him from the ugliness of everything.. of life, of memories and pain. "Oh, Shae," I whisper, reaching out xnxx korea a tear-stained hand to lightly rest on his cheek, letting my fingers rub slowly against against the chill skin, feel the weird texture of the xnxx hot medicinal tape against my touch. I look down and away from his face, straining to see through his hair. Just barely I can see a xxnx bandage on the back of his head, a white patch of sterile brightness amongst his dirty, bloody hair. I can hear him breathing, but it doesn't sound like his normal breathing.. it sounds forced and very mechanical. I shudder as I stare, unable to process this whole zoo xnxx thing clearly. Feeling my tears land like hot droplets of wax on my cheeks, I slip my hand into his, squeezing its stillness xnxx tamil lightly, holding onto it even as I hear his door open. Looking around and trying to wipe away my tears, I come face to face with a nurse, who merely smiles at me politely, and heads around me to the other side of the bed, checking the IV bags that hang off to the side. I watch her for a moment before looking down again, looking at Shae's closed eyes. Closing my eyes, I try not xnxxcom to start xnxx sex video crying noticeably as I hear the nurse moving. Go away, I xnxn plead to her desperately, feeling my body xnxx arab xnxx hd start to triumph over my xxnn mind. But then: "You must be Jeremiah." I open my eyes and look painfully over xnxx selingkuh at the smiling nurse, who has long red hair and a very feline face. I nod wordlessly and look free xnxx back down to Shae. She follows my gaze and smiles tenderly, reaching out a hand to brush lightly against his face and through his hair. "He is very worried about you." I blink, and look up at her. She smiles, and gestures back down to him. "People in comas can oftentimes hear what is going on around them, they just can't respond. Your other friend, Brendan, has come in here and sat with him, talking. I couldn't help but overhear him speaking, and noticed that everytime he nxxn mentioned the name 'Miah', Sheldon's heartbeat would quicken noticably. Brendan even said that xnxx sex videos he felt Sheldon's hand close around his for a second a few times." I xnxx desi smile tearfully down at him, and squeeze his hand again, not knowing what to say. "He will be alright, Jeremiah, I promise you. He has a strong japanese xnxx will to beat this... he is already doing much better than we'd hoped. But I will leave you indian xnxx two alone now... just videos xnxx make sure you tell him you love him." And with that, she winks and leaves the room. I look down at him quietly, speaking shakily. "Hey..." I say, lifting his hand gently and pressing the back of it to my cheek. The needle taped to his skin presses coldly against my flesh, but I ignore it. "I... I don't know if you can hear this.. but... I... want to xnxxcom thank you. I wish I could find some way of xnxx app making it up porn xnxx to you.... even though you are a complete fool for doing what you did..." jav xnxx Closing my eyes, I kiss his xnxx mom fingers gently, feeling my heart breaking slowly. "You'd better get through this, Shae," I tell him brokenly, swallowing painfully. "I need you to phim xnxx wake up so I can apologize for getting xnxx desi you phim xnxx into this awful mess. And... don't worry about the picture, okay? It's fine... I... understand." xxx xnxx Slowly, I let his hand xmxx fall xnxxx back onto the bed, and I lean over slowly to kiss his forehead. His skin smells like antiseptic and blood, but I kiss it anyway, letting my tears drip xnxx com into his hair. "Wake up," I tell him desperately, kissing him again. "I need you to do this..." I kiss him again and again, moving to his cheeks, his chin, his nose, anything I phim xnxx can touch. My xnxx stories fingers find his again, and I hold them www xnxx com tightly as I press feverish kisses to his face, shaking with words unsaid and burning tears unshed. "I love xnxx selingkuh you..." I kiss his fingers one by one, trembling with sobs, whispering those same three words to him over and over and over, until I can't say them anymore. Letting his hand fall heavily back down again, I stand there with my head bowed, crying stupidly until I can't take it anymore and I have to leave the room, heading home in a blinded daze. * * * * Date: Tue, 11 Mar 2003 23:49:02 -0500 From: Stabbing Westward Junkie Subject: Dylan Thomas By The Dying Light - Chapter Seven [Author's Note: Thanks again to all who wrote to me bokep xnxx with their thoughts on the last chapter, and I xnxxcom give many hopeless blushes to those who told me they sacrificed indo xnxx going to important classes, appointments, or even work simply to read this story. The knowledge of this seriously knocked me on my ass. Thank you... I think it is the greatest xnx.com compliment I have ever received. www.xnxx.com A shout out to Cory as well... thank you for all your kind words... they xnxx porno were poetry in and of themselves. I am sorry this chapter has been so delayed... but I hope tamil xnxx it was worth the wait. - bows to Tace xxnx.com - Thank you, especially, Tace... your honesty, friendship and 'fangirl' affliction means more than you could ever know. xnxx movies - T] It has been two weeks and a day since Shae fell into the coma. Absolutely nothing noteworthy has happened between now and then, excepting his gradual improvement in health. I've been visiting him each day, and each time gets better and better, with fewer monitors taped xnxx teen to his skin and less needles shoved into his flesh. He has xxnx.com gotten xnxx xnxx colour back to his face, and is breathing without the aid of an oxygen mask. mom xnxx But still no sign of waking. The doctors tell me that everything physically is fine, they're just waiting for him to wake up. His head wound is almost healed; the bone tamil xnxx has started to reconstruct itself and the plate was taken off. They've still got his head bandaged now, but at least they've washed his hair and skin, ridding it of the xnxx porno battlescars of blood and pain. As for myself, my shoulder is doing alright, except for the fact that I can't lift my arm above my head without it protesting painfully. I've mostly just been moping around in black, depressed moods, avoiding everyone, including free xnxx Brendan. I just can't make myself be sociable; my brain is video xnxx a swollen, worried mess with all of its energy and power locked on Shae. Jamie's words have not left my memory, but I haven't been able to go into Shae's room since I got back. Everytime I try, I start xnxx jav to feel sick and I have to turn away. I lean against his door now, my head pressed to the wall, my hand clasping the handle tightly, desperately. I want to go in... I want to find out what Jamie was talking about... but can I? Or will xnnn I walk in there and crumple to the ground in the face of all his stuff, of his aura imprinted in the very walls and floor? I miss him so much.. it's incredible how much I do. I've never missed anyone like this. But then again, I've www xnxx com never loved someone so much. I just want him to appear, healthy and well, and let me hold him for as long as I need to, not cracking any stupid jokes or anything like that. Just standing there silently, letting me hug him. God... what a fucking shitty mess. And on that thought, I push all others aside and open his door, keeping my gaze on the carpet as I close it behind me. Instantly I am bombarded with his scent, one I have missed and has temporarily been replaced with zoo xnxx nasty hospital xnxx japanese smell. It envelopes me like some sort porno xnxx of angelic, erotic mist, and I stand there, trembling slightly, breathing it in deeply, greedily. The bokep xnxx soft undertone of aftershave combined with his usual forest-like smell, and the faint touch of cologne. It sinks in through my lungs and perforates my entire body until I can breathe xnxx tamil it in no more and I exhale shakily, feeling the whole of Life rise up and attack me as I do so. This is too much.. too much, I can xnxx com hear my brain screaming feverishly at me. Get out, get out... this is not your room... this is his... this is wrong. But I open my eyes slowly, trying to xnxx sex video ignore the yelling in my head. As I do, my gaze falls to his bed. Frowning slightly, I take a step closer, trying to figure out what is lying on the sheets, still unmade from when he last lay in them. xnxx sex videos A square of something glitters up at me, wwwxnxx and I don't see what it is until I am almost kneeling on the bed, my hand outstretched to touch it. And when I do recognize it, my hand jerks away as if xnxx india bitten, and videos xnxx I stare at it blankly, not knowing whether to laugh or scream. It is my picture. The one he broke... except it's not broken any longer. The glass is fixed, and the frame is back together, the cracks barely visable. The photograph looks almost perfect, and I pick it up slowly, unbelievingly, wanting to cry but having no more tears left. "Jesus," I whisper, staring at it. His photographed eyes stare out at me penetratingly, clairvoyantly, and I gasp, shuddering, as their memory comes back to me. I've been without them for two weeks... something I always took for granted gone. I hold the frame as cautiously as I can, staring at it wonderingly, feeling a helpless, hopeful grin touch my lips. The www xnxx pain of all of this makes itself xnxx jav known to me as I hold it, reminds me that I am xnxx teen in his room without him, that he is gone to some place that I cannot follow him to, xnxx hindi but in this moment the pain is beautiful. A bitter beautiful, but one that I would not trade for any other just now. Amongst all the hell surrounding me, I hold in my hands a peice of pure, undisputable Hope. Something that was once broken is now remade... by the hands of one whose heart I thought I jav xnxx had lost. Gently letting the frame lie back down on the bed, I turn away, my eyes bright with a slow-kindling faith, and make my way to his desk. Pulling xnxx desi out the grey, rolling chair, I sit down in it carefully, perching myself on the edge of it as xnxx telugu I behold his books. They lie in a cluttered, hasty mess on the table, which is xnxx download also strewn with countless pencils and pens, a half-finished xnxx porn glass of water, and a stack of www xnxx com 'Stop Bedwetting!' pamphlets, which makes me laugh helplessly, remembering all xnnx the times Shae'd snuck them into people's xnxx asia backpacks and lockers just for the fun of seeing their faces when they pulled them out again. Taking a deep breath, I look to the first notebook, which is a sleek, un-used sex xnxx looking sheaf of paper. Hesitantly I open the cover and begin to turn desi xnxx the pages, my eyes flickering over the scant notes quickly. But free porn xnxx I find nothing of Jamie's confessions, and I close it, putting it aside. The next are textbooks, and I push xnxx app them aside, knowing that if he wrote in them, he'd be paying a hefty fine and so xmxx wouldn't do it for that reason. The next are notebooks for the rest of his courses, and I slowly look through them all, smiling at the little doodles on the margins, but none of them being what I am looking for. Finally the last book comes xnxx mom to veiw, and I xnxx vina garut stare at it in consternation. I have never seen this one before. It's cover nxxn is a dark rose colour, gone white in slender traceries all over it where it has bent. It looks xnxx video old, and well-used. I can see the pages sticking out, most are rumpled at the edges and yellowed slightly. I stare at it for a moment longer, and then open it. The xnxx com first page comes into view, and I pale, feeling my www.xnxx.com blood xnxx arab sink out of my head and into my heart, where it sits there sluggishly, xnxx tube awash in shock. In the center of the page is an unmistakable sketch of my face, done in a light green ink, and below it is his flowing script, a few stanzas of a song I know all too well. I stare at it stupidly, noticing how exaggerated my eyes seem.... eyelashes long and sweeping, and my irises done with almost painstaking intricacy. 'I alone love you I alone tempt you I alone love you Fear is not the end of this' My mouth dry and my www.xnxx eyes starting to sting, xnxx tube I turn xnxx bokep to the next page. 'Where were you upon the day upon xxx xnxx the night when the last star died?' Below that is a starkly drawn male silhouette, superimposed on a pair of cracked, bleeding lips. I lift my fingers and run them over the picture wonderingly, letting myself feel the grooves where the pen bit deep, unable to shake the feeling that vidio xnxx I xnxxx have him spread out before me, like I have his heart completely at my discovery. I keep turning the pages slowly, until one xnxx.com catches my eye, and literally sends me falling off the chair once I xnxx porn have completed sex xnxx xxnxx reading the words gathered on its pristine surface. Below it is a picture of my face, again... but very different than the first. I am xnxx movies depicted with my eyes closed, free porn xnxx and my lips parted, tears trailing out from under my eyelids... if it wasn't of me, it would look very, very, very sexy. 'Velvet xnxx selingkuh sky In my dreams it did xnx blush darkly I had you alone, in my arms Naked and gloriously. I pushed you down Hurt you until you cried I made you mine, under darkened skies Made it so that my desire you could not deny Your ocean eyes And videos xnxx darkling hair Covered xnxx jepang in tears, and sweat You pushed up against me Until our throbbing needs met This place of sin And endless xxnx painful submission Is the deepest throne of my heart And I have you shackled, xnxx 2020 chained and bound there So that our secret xmxx can never part.' Shaking, I sit on the floor xnxx 2020 with the book in my lap, re-reading the stanzas slowly, undeniable arousal building despite of it all. Jesus... Jesus. I... never knew this... God... The next page is a flowing sketch done in bright red nxxn ink, of two males, one with layered, shoulder-length hair, the other's xnxx sex is hanging in touseled discourse over his hidden eyes. They have www.xnxx their arms wrapped around each other tightly, xnxn heads resting on the others shoulders. Their hips are pressed together, and one has his hand slipped in between the two of them, undoubtably creating the look of extacy that hangs erotic and complete xxnxx on the other's face. Under it is penned the words: 'Shae + Miah in Never nxnn Never Land'. I gape at it helplessly, unable to tear my telugu xnxx eyes away from it as my groin begins to burn. The next pages are similar in their design, all of them having me porn xnxx featuring somehow, some dark and angry, others stark and plain. The last page captures my attention completely, and I stare at it for what feels like hours, the words burning xnxx.com like molten amber into my mind. The backround is black, the words white and blazing. 'i've loved you for an eternity and a day. i am unrequited and forgotten, a quill of infandum lost amongst the grey. but i cannot cease desiring you -- my body lusts like nothing i have ever experienced outside of all that is You. xxnx.com the logics of my mind are like feathers in the face of a gale, xnnn and they are torn and tossed amongst the rain and lacerating lightning. you are my truth, my hatred, xnxxx my neverending story. i wish i could lose you so that i telugu xnxx could say i had you. i wish i could have you so i could lose xnxx anime you. xnxx vina garut in the presence of my struggle, the beauty of you alone i cannot shake. you invade all my private moments, and strike down gay xnxx every defence i gay xnxx erect against you. in the darkness xnx.com of it all, xnxx hindi you have brought me down to nothing. you have pulled www.xnxx me xnxx sex video down to the japan xnxx level of a bleeding, whimpering, crying whore, spread and begging for more. and i xnx.com hate you for this, miah. i hate you. because you have defeated me. you have made me want you in xnxx bokep the ways that i have never wanted anyone. i xnxx porn hate you because you have made me love you so completely. i am xnxx jav your perfect slave. if only you could realize that you hold me in your thrall, your every wish is my wish. my wrists are jav xnxx bound, my mouth gagged shut. yet you will not touch me. tempt me only. is this what it comes to?' I do free xnxx not realize I am crying until the tears spatter on the page, making the black inked backround begin to run. But I cannot stop it, nor can I move the book away, my eyes locked on the words that have echoed in my heart since I first fell in love with him, xnxx japanese the words that looked like they are torn gay xnxx straight from my deepest, most hidden heart. Thoughts crowd my feverish mind, random visions of him xnnn overlayed with this new, sudden knowledge and creating a longing so deep and demanding in my heart that I almost faint dead away. "Shae..." I whisper xnxx japan disbelievingly, gaping at the page. "Shae..." And then a sudden noise makes my head snap up and the xxn book fall, open, to the side. xnxx vina garut The door is moving, swinging open, and I am suddenly presented with desi xnxx an impossible vision of Shae. I gasp as I see him, and stumble backwards, hitting my head resoundingly on the corner of his bedframe. He stands there silently, his xnxx telugu eyes looking from me to the book lying at my side. I stare up at him in shock, not quite xxx xnxx able to process this. His face is pale and withdrawn, his eyes as strong as ever, but with a veneer of pain that shimmers darkly in their depths, pain experienced and overcome, but the memory xnxx download never, ever erased. Their blueness sears me unforgivingly, and I can hear myself stammering as he looks to the book xnxx hot again. His xnxx sex videos hair is tied back in a untidy ponytail, several wisps of straw-coloured strands escaping the tie and hanging vidio xnxx around his elegant features. His jacket hangs on his shoulders limply; his whole body looks skinnier than I remember it to be. One hand is holding onto the strap of his backpack, the other holds onto the door handle absently. The medical tape is xnxx 2020 still stuck on the backs of his hands, and I see his hospital bracelet on his wrist. He stands there strangely, looking for all the world xnx like he is about xnxx hot to www xnxx dissapear any xnxx bokep second now. "What... what the.. what the hell are you doing here?" I sputter, unable to stop myself, tears still crowding my gaze. He watches me silently for a moment longer, and I see his tongue dart out to moisten porno xnxx his pale lips slowly. When he speaks, it is his usual calm voice, xnxx korea giving nothing of his experience xnxx sex away. This is when xnxx videos I start to feel the first irrational strains of anger build. "They let me go today. I demanded to come home." "You xnxx japan demanded." I xnxx porno can feel myself visably starting to shake, a rage so xxn majestic throbbing in my chest and hands. I can't pinpoint why I am angry.. xnxx gay all I know is that I feel like I am going to explode.. "Yes." "But.. you were.. in coma. How the hell did.... they can't.... you SHOULDN'T BE HERE! You were in a coma!!" "I woke up." Simply stated, calm. I stare at xnxx teen him, shaking like a leaf, anger peircing my gaze. He stands there as quietly as ever, though, simply gazing back at me, xxnn his eyes caught in their usual mysterious tranquility, even though his body looks fragile and breakable. He shifts slightly as he stands there and looks away for a xnxx anime second, moistening his lips again before looking back. And when xnxx tamil he does, I begin to understand my anger. "How do you feel?" I ask him, my fists clenching. "Fine... they took the bandage off this morning.. so I have stitches now.. and a little bandaid type thing..." " 'Fine'," I echo in xnxx gay indo xnxx a xxn hiss. "You xnx feel fine." "Yes..." he sex xnxx says clearly, doubt and confusion finally beginning to show in his gaze. "What about you?" he xnxx stories asks xnxx japan carefully, concern welling up in his eyes as he says this. And I think this is when xnxx tv I snap. I slowly get to my feet. He hasn't said anything about the book. He hasn't asked xxnx me why am I in his room. Surely he knows what I have been doing here. But instead, he asks me how I am. He's been off in fucking nowhere land for the past two weeks, and then decides to waltz back in here like nothing even happened. He scared the fucking shit out of me.. and yet here japan xnxx he is, as calm as anything, looking at me with that GODDAMNED tranquil gaze, being so strong.. always xnxx download being so strong.. taking everything onto his indian xnxx shoulders as usual. And he's come out of it fine. Is standing in xnxx videos the goddamned doorway, looking beautiful and for the most part, unscathed. I begin to see red. "You almost died," I snap, my voice rising hysterically. "My best friend almost died. How the fuck do you think I am?" He looks away and down. We stand there like this for a few moments, he with his gaze downcast, and me almost shaking myself to bits with rage. "I'm sorry," xnxx gay he whispers suddenly, his soft voice laced with sincerity, empathy and fear. I can see the bandaid through his nxnn hair now. "I'm... really.. sorry." My mouth falls open. He's sorry?? He's apologizing to me, after HE was the one who almost died? What the fuck...? "Are you fucking kidding me?" I xnxx mom ask him, forgetting myself as I begin to advance on him, wanting to shake him senseless. "... what do you mean?" He asks uncomfortably, after a moment, holding his xxnxx ground as I approach, looking at me nervously. "Why the HELL are you sorry?!? WHY? THIS xnxx indian WAS MY FAULT!!!" I scream this at him, and he flinches. "This wasn't your fault, Miah," he says calmly, firmly, and again I see him become divine in front of my eyes, a holy strength to him that I cannot fathom or touch. And I hate him for it. "Fuck you!!" I yell, free porn xnxx shaking. "You are such an asshole, do you know that?? I've been sitting here for fifteen days, crying my eyes out, praying to gods that I don't even believe in to save you, to bring you back to me. MY WHOLE WORLD HAS BEEN A MESS without you and then suddenly you come back into it like NOTHING happened!!! You stand xnxx korea here at this fucking door, looking like you've just had a bad cold and that's all!! Not like you almost had your brains smashed to bits! Not like I sat beside your bed every single day, holding your hand, begging you to make it through! AND YOU SAY YOU'RE SORRY!!!!!!" And with that, I scream and fly at him. Never mom xnxx mind that he's just gotten out of a coma. He takes mom xnxx an involuntary step back and throws his hands up to stop me, but I come at him too porn xnxx fast, and xnxx jepang he flies backward, landing on the floor with me on top of him. We slide on the floor for about a foot until my hands connect with a table xnxx video and yank us to a stop. He's got his hands around my wrists as I punch at him, and I can't see anything through my white-hot tears, I can't feel xnxx app anything but perfect hate and love balanced like a razor on xxnn my xnxx movies heart as I xnxx tube flail wildly xnxx videos at him. "I xnxx arab hate you! Why xnxn do you have to be so perfect all the time?? Why?!" I sob these words incoherently, feeling my fists hit home again and again. But after a moment, I slow down, realizing that he is making no move to stop me. He lies under me without moving, his hands on my wrists but not applying any pressure to slow them down. His eyes are closed, his face a mask of pain. xnxx hd ACCEPTING pain. I stare at him for a moment, realizing this, and it only gets japan xnxx me angrier. He's letting me xnxx barat do this! He's letting me xnxx jepang punch the shit out of him because he knows I need video xnxx to! Rage at this makes me yell at the top of my lungs. I begin to claw at his porno xnxx chest, his arms, whatever I can get a hold of, wanting to make him xnxx xnxx fight me back. "Fight back, you asshole! FIGHT BACK!!!" I keep hitting him, and he keeps lying there, submitting to it, which makes me more and more frenzied. But suddenly the door indian xnxx to the dorm flies open, and I see Brendan run in. But I don't stop hitting Shae, my tears blinding me to everything but my hatred. I can feel arms reach down around me as if to try and pull me off, but suddenly Shae wwwxnxx is xnxx india sitting up, shoving video xnxx them off me. "Fuck off!" he screams at Brendan, even as I www xnxx hit him. "Get the fuck out of here!!" I shriek with rage at this, knowing perfectly well his intent. He's going to let me spend myself... he's going to let me take what I need, fully and